Brighten Retirement Do's Up With Retirement Jokes

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By Colin Jones

Most people approach retirement with a gloomy countenance. They approach retirement as if it is giving into the hands of fate and the debilitation of the body. Therefore, it is very important to help the retiree realize that retirement is something to be accepted because it is an inevitable development in life. But how can you do that? Its not so difficult: just poke fun at retirement. Retirement jokes, like the ones made in speeches are popular. However, speeches tend to become emotional to the point where everyone in the room is in a state of gloom and sympathy. But one can raise the level of the mood with retirement jokes (without insulting the retiree, of course).

Examples: In addition to speaking about the great times the speaker has shared with the retiree, he/she can add something that will lighten up the mood. One could give a tombstone slab, with the inscription For Future Use on it. If you're a friend, you could also make a joke by calling the retiree granddad or grandfather whenever the retiree speaks to you, as in "OK, granddad". This may also help lighten the atmosphere. But dont go over the top, of course.

Another gag that could help is a wig in strong colour like pink, green or purple. A follow up gag to that jocularity might be that he might require a headpiece in the very near future. If he declines it, say: Okay, then wear a paper bag instead when you do go bald. Always be prepared for when a joke doesnt succeed. So keep those backup jokes ready! Believe it or not, some agencies write and sell personalized retirement speeches with witty jokes built in after knowing the personality and interests of the retiree. These companies usually add jokes about the retirees profession. If one cannot find enough retirement jokes, a visit to a bookshop can help a great deal.

There are joke books that cover a wide range of topics, only one of which is retirement. A little search on this or that will help inspire the reader if he/she isnt a natural comedian. These may also be good retirement gifts too, helping the retiree have a good laugh on one of those boring Monday afternoons. There are also a lot of websites on the net that provide a lot of jokes and free retirement e-books. The e-books that are available range from the 100 Best Things Said about Retirement to Retirement Wisdom You Wont Get from your Bank Manager.

Conclusion: You have a lot of leeway when telling jokes at a retirement party. If you know someone who is approaching retirement, you can first send an email or two which has retirement quotations like retirement is when everyday is Saturday and retirement: goodbye tension, hello pension!. It is a good gesture and gives the impression that you know what the future retiree is going through.

Again, keep the retiree (future or not) relaxed as much as you can. Make him/her anticipate retirement with a smile and not with a sigh as much as you can. And when the retirement party does come, keep the same light-hearted approach, inserting jokes here and there and doing some gags like the ones said above. Not only will the retiree feel less wary about retirement, he/she will focus more on the people who kept him happy on that bitter-sweet day, especially the person that presented him with that strange pink wig.

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